And sitting here happiness all around.. and an email prompts me to read it's contents then load an image .. So I, of course, flick through the many, many photographs of the Pipster and the latest are the worse, ones of her before she died in her foster care.. and then I see the huge amount I took the week before she was taken.. 

I look ashen, I look like I have lost the will to live.. and I know, actually this wasn't so far from the truth.. 

And seeing Pip and me and this remembering makes me feel physically sick, I still don't know how I made it through those days, hakenharfe without good friends warmly Allee finnlines Storkow Anfänger der wahrhafte liv3 Fausto kinderfotograf.at me makes me think of lifes..

Lols I was talking into my phone.. shall leave the words that came out.. lols Hooked harp is apparently the hakenharfe!!

So... This isn't going to stop my words.. 

Seeing Pip and this remembering.. I could not have survived without family and good friends, but also made me think of the inevitability of life.. 

Now! I have had two wonderful weeks in the UK.. and this should be my focus just now.. Not this issue of always looking back into what was and what will never be ..

Top of the page a hint of where we went when I was at Tony's.. and above taken in a park in Nottingham..

More mañana..

M.