The world changed again today

My dear dear friend Peter Maddocks passed today..

Drinking a glass of wine this evening in his honor..

And I am feeling the loss of this man in my life..

The books we did together, the many many books..

Such a life and history.. 

Fleet street cartoonist, children's cartoons on tv.. the books .. the books.

All I can today, I feel very sad

M.

Some very strange disturbing dreams last night, about a dearly loved friend of mine.. three quite separate dreams. I tried to work out some meaning of the last one, that seems the clearer, he is young and healthy and selling off his van, a huge heavy solid ancient mace!! And other very random items!! 

Then this in the bathroom when I came downstairs..

Feathers in unexplained places! Very very odd! 

Quiet day today, just chillin and relaxing..

While ago... Son was upstairs awhile with the niblets, as my mom called the boys.. and hadn't signed off on Overwatch so I had to wing it there awhile.. I got his character killed a couple of times.. and damaged his cred a little, maybe , definitely! Couple of players were like 'what's happening with him!' Not knowing his mom had taken control, or rather not actually very well, and under instruction from other son still playing! So funny!

M.

That you were sleeping doesn't occur to you until you are awake.

J T Caine - Writer Poet

Thursday, not the Arboretum, just more photographs from Wednesday... 

I got the tram and passed through the city and got off near Dunelm store.. just had a wander around then walked to B&M, got a few bits from there.. It was the biggest B&M store I've ever seen! I couldn't walk around it! Especially knowing I still have to walk back to town!

The footstool in Dunelm, I have to show you! The lid lifts up, not a box, or storage.. No... I is a single bed! Absolutely brilliant! 

I walked down to the canal and back into town from there.. 

Took a great shot of the apartments but can't post here yet, waiting to see if it gets picked up on a site I sell photography on, it'll never make me rich,.but one has sold four times!! When they're licensed on there I can't upload anywhere else.

Anyways! I got the tram home from town and not much else! 

Yesterday I went to the park and walked it's length, then walked right and up along the top through the trees, still overlooking the playing fields and carpark area..

I was watching a man skipping, and as I approached him, thought how us girls skipped so much when younger then stop! But now in the gym you see guys skipping! I have a skipping rope in a box, in storage! Used to go on the terrace and skip! Once the people in the town hall had all gone home!! 

So I get alongside this man and he stops and says 'you want a go?' and I do! I took his rope and skipped! Just for a few minutes! Hilarious eh! So funny, but also such good fun! He wasn't a young guy, probably about the same age as me, you know, 50's! I say laughing!

Afterwards I thanked him, turned my music back on and continued my walk! Feeling very happy for having skipped!

When I was back I tidied up an area some workmen next door had messed up in my son's front yard! 

Unearthing worms and centipedes, and a few different sorts of spiders! Quite a collection of wildlife going on there unseen!! 

M.

Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change”

Quote from Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

Yesterday I went to the Nottingham Contemporary Art Gallery..

No photographs, it says no photography..

The artist Donald Rodney.. link is from The Guardian newspaper.

Well worth the visit if the artists works come near you! A young artist and if you read about his works, he made a huge impression in his short life.

And a huge difference in this world in a short time..

After the gallery I wandered around for a while..

Had no real purpose, which is nice.. 

Stopped to talk to promoter in the street, poor guy didn't get a word in!

But instead he got a pocketbook version of my life!!! He asked!! Bless him!

I should have a government health warning sticker on my head! Do not start a conversation with this woman, you'll hear more than you ever thought you needed to!

And today! Walk to and through Nottingham Arboretum.. 

Beautiful at any time, but more so in autumn.. and most of the leaves have fallen already.. gorgeous..

Of course me being me, got a little sad over a bird! He was alone, and quiet and I whistled at him... He looked a bit more lively when I walked off to the next aviaries.. Oh yes, he is in an aviary.  Not randomly in a tree! I am not talking to random birds flying about!! Honestly!

Then he started singing! 

He was quiet when I went back, but he flew back to me, and started to sing again... So sweet...

He is a Diamond Dove.. It says the birds here have all come from people who could no longer look after them, for whatever reasons..

He should be paired up or in a small flock.. Google says..

'If you only keep a single dove then after a period of time the bird will probably bond on you. Doves are very social and thus have a need to be close to a living being. Indication that bonding has taken place are wing flicking and kissing.'

M.

The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes.” ― Arthur Conan Doyle

A David Gilmour song today, just this.. nothing more..

Scattered 

Take my arm and walk with me

Once more down this dusty old path

The sunset cuts the hill in half

Our shadows stretch back to touch the night

The light's fading, you say

But these darkening days

Flow like honey

These days slowing down

A whole life in a glance

The clearest light shines in the darkness

Shining on me

And we're still doing this dance

One step at a time

As the days slip by

As smooth as glass

The moments pass

And all these precious things you gave

That I've been holding in my hands

These grains of sand

A man stands in a river

Pushes against the stream

Time is a tide that disobeys

It disobeys me

These days slowing down

A whole life in a glance

The clearest light shines in the darkness

Still shining on me

And we're still doing this dance

The Moon and the stars

As the days slip by

As smooth as glass

The moments pass

And all these precious things you gave

Falling through my hands

These worlds, this scattered sand

I stand in a river

Push against the stream

Time is a tide that disobeys

And it disobeys me

It never ends

Written by: Charlie Gilmour / David Gilmour / Polly Samson

It's just a color, and behind it the sun shines gloriously!

It has been six days now since I wore my shades... And would like, appreciate some of those golden rays! but, non the less, there has been no rain!

So eyes wide open, bring it on day!! 

The weather and us, we are, or can be, the same.

We hide away much of ourselves behind the clouds.. clouds of laughter or straight faces, masking our feelings or true color's... Like the old Cindy Lauper Song..

To feel safe? To protect?

I think some people have built such walls they become so impenetrable they can neither be reached or even know now how to break free...

Or never want to... risk it.

People, we keep ourselves hidden so much, our brightness our sunshine.. 

And these days are not like past days, or places? We'd always say 'hello' always a smile or nod 'good morning' always the smile that could be the only one someone else might see that day.

I miss the J's at work, so much it brings tears now as I write, we were always shining working together..

Maybe that's it, we burn brighter together. You can see it when people do that, they spark of each other and it's wonderful to see, to feel that.

M.

November 7th 2015.. the Pipster.. 

I guess it'll take a while to get through all the clothes I bought over with me, pulling on sweaters that smell of home, that familiar smell..

Thank you Google!

'If the hippocampus deems the smell important — if it were connected with a particularly emotional moment, for example — it can file the information and store it indefinitely. Even decades later, the same scent can bring the memory and emotional salience of the moment flooding back'

This is so true isn't it... I have locked in the smell of blackberries freshly picked and soaked into the sleeve of my handknitted sweater my mom made for me, the only thing, the only one.

I seem to have posted the above, with quote, yesterday without actually finishing it! 

Hope not too many people noticed as I hadn't shared it yet!

Tuesday I came back to sons in Nottingham, didn't see Jasmine on the train! That would have been way too weird! Good journey though, nice and easy, Kidderminster to Birmingham Snow Hill, then a quick walk through town to New Street.. 

I passed the Christmas tree and the Christmas village being built ready for celebrations.. much the same as here in Nottingham.. 

Then it was down to board for Nottingham, waiting on the platform (feel like bursting into song here), this song... It's sad, deep, meaningful, and if that's not your bag baby don't go there!

Okay, back in the room everyone!

Then to Nottingham, I walked into town rather than jump on the tram directly here, for some fresh air and exercise.

Birmingham New Street, the platform! Laughing to myself is where I left the room! A train was sat there waiting, engine running! Diesel! Air quality zero, we were all coughing! What's going on! Underground with little aircon or noticable aircon I guess? Ughhh! Bad! That's why I needed the fresh air!

That was Tuesday!

Wednesday I walked to The Range in the afternoon, went into town in the morning for another ECG! 

And at some point this week the doctor started me on some more meds for my BP, not replacement, just more!

Was expecting some of the common side effects, nothing, weird mindset I know, but no side effects, so think are they actually doing anything at all? Keeping close eye on BP last couple of days... Nothing yet!

Thought I'd check, as I write this, as I sound extra hopeful for effects to come into place... Dr Google says 'immediately' for some BP meds, for mine? Says hours! So, that's not good is it? Nothing 'appening 'ere!

M.

Time isn't the main thing. It's the only thing.

Miles Davis - 1926-1991 - American Trumpeter