The Spoon Theory...

I am bothering everyone with my aches and pain just now after the long haul promotion and now this damp weather, of course the worry about my mom and other stuff now all culminating in making my FM worse.

I have just come across a very good story, one which explains in a different way how us with FM and lots of other things like this live our lives day to day.

The Story is called The Spoon Theory... this links to the site and the story is then just a click away...

will it please stop raining? it wasn't too bad this morning around 10am i got into town ok, but the cloud came down and so up came the para aquas! Spanish is so easy isn't it! para sol (for sun) and of course para aqua (for water!) how can we possibly go wrong?!?

it rained all day Sunday... and the forecast shows rain for the next 3 or 4 days, G R E A T! although of course could be worse, it could be cold also!


some more views here of the road coming up into Alhaurín from Fuengirola, on the left here you can see where people have lost their land by about 20 or 30 foot to the new road.
apparently(?) this land may have been borrowed by them and it always belonged to the high ways people? not sure who spread this rumor....

but now coming and going up or down the road you can at the


moment see much more than we used to, the roadside bushes all gone including lots of trees and orchards!

these two pipes in situ here headed towards Finca La Mota,
will be carrying something, and i guess as they haven't been sunk very deep the ground level here will have to be raised somewhat.




in town the municipal library building that came to a stand still some time ago, looks like getting moving again in February 2009, not sure if they will keep everything where it is... remembering the photos i took from the Cudeca window showing one of the Library's floors coming right up to the windows, allowing no light or air to enter, ok in winter but in summer? will be awful! and the same for the people whose apartments above have the wall immediately in front of they're balcony's... can you imagine standing on your small terrace and having a brick wall 2 or 3 foot away from you,

especially having had full sun since you moved in! would be very depressing.

also in a paper i came across an article about Fords here in Spain, now is the time to buy with huge discounts at the moment on new cars 10 or 20% percent, cant remember which, so don't quote me!!!!

this last photo is the corner approaching the garden centre, will they get rid of this bend altogether do you think?

TTFN
Marian

Fibromyalgia/The Polkerdotgals

when i was finally told i had Fibromyalgia it was by a doctor who handed me a leaflet, with a pat on the head and a "read this"!!! this in 1995 after six years of tests and operations! i was lucky it was only six years!

this is a short video, well 14 minutes, please have a look. Its on the Fibromyalgia Association web site.

TTFN
Marian

today Boxing Day, Franco and I went down to Miramar centre, not many people there that's for sure... here we were up stairs sitting down for a bite to eat and no one else in sight, although there were more by the time we left...

after Miramar we went onto El Corte Inglés, again! I know twice in one week, so thats it for me for the next few months! not many people in there again either...


this shot comes to you from the top of Miramar, above the restaurants... what a beautiful day, yesterday was a bit cloudy over Alahurín, dont know about the coast.

we saw lots of - no sorry, we saw some holiday makers and they were wearing shorts and t-shirts... brrrrrr! and from this vantage point looking down to one of the hotels below people were in nik-binis! by the pool!! heck!



when i was taking the first photo i spied this little fellow hanging on in there well above the rest of the world of christmas going on beneath him! a balloon from Halloween! he must have had his fair share of gas to keep him up this long!




and then below one of the first lot of shots i took coming up the road from fuengirola of all the road workings going on... the road will be widened and less bends, making the distance .8k less, well mas or meno, we shall see... the other photos tomorrow, they came out quite well considering the speed Franco drives?!?

when we got home i went up on to the terrace to see how warm it was up there... still cooler in the house but 29.9 in the sun! fantastic, i sat out and read for half hour, but then the sun started to go down to low and although most of me was getting warm my legs started to get cold! so down i have come and now here i am... thinking of dinner again, seems like only yesterday.... we had lamb it was beautiful, only we forgot mint sauce! i know i know... and we also forgot to buy a christmas pud, so its no wonder christmas is missing from my life this year! and i know i had five months free of cooking this year with my honey doing all that while i was on that promo but yesterday when Franco saw me with the chicken, (for today by the way) he thought i was going to cook another roast dinner! two on one day... humph, i ask you!!!

Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.
Paulo Coehlo

TTFN
Marian

I have borrowed this link from a friend.... please watch and listen to this beautiful piece Assisi Nativity....

had more bad news this morning, my aunt Pat in Canada died yesterday... can we please just get to the end of this year now! my mom read out a letter yesterday evening that Pat had sent her, now feels like words from beyond...

still doesn't feel like Christmas to me, feel like there is a piece missing... think i will find out what time Franco is coming home today... early i hope!

Why do we have to listen to our hearts?" "Because, wherever your heart is, that is where you'll find your treasure.
Paulo Coelho

TTFN and a Very Merry Christmas to you all...
Marian

ok interesting! was going to put a photo on here, but the photo is on its side in my images and when i click to enlarge and turn, as normal, the photo is coming up from my picasa and in there its already done?! heck, well cant think about it now i don't have enough room in my head just now.

i had to make a list so i could remember what to write today, am really suffering with tiredness, keep waking up as per usual for the last 20 years! can it really be so long, yes in may of next year since i had an op which on the one hand saved my life and on the other seemed to either begin or just make worse my fibromyalgia... but now instead of just going straight back to sleep i am staying awake and this cant go on its hard to concentrate or even just be bothered to...

this morning at last i saw a couple i had been looking out for since my return home, they had called a couple of times when i was doing the promo, but i was of course not home! so hadn't seen them since may! we had a good long chat in the street and so moved into the nearest bar to continue! for coffee of course! i was well coffee'd out had had two already with friends at the cruz, seen my buddy in the animal rescue shop and had quick run though super sol! i had told Pippa i would only be a couple of hours but i think after my whole month away she doesn't believe a word i tell her!

yesterday Franco got an afternoon off and we went down to El Corte Inglés and guess what we found there? the game i was hunting in England last month! Professor Layton and the Curious Village.... cant wait now to get cracking into it! i have been trying to plough through Hotel Dusk for what must be a couple of year... bit sad that is isn't it! but, and the but is how do you know what your supposed to do, when your going along, for instance in one spot you find a pen, the inscription is poor, it turns out you have to go into the kitchen find a sack of flour that's torn open and put some flour on the pen to read it! how would you ever know to do that, or am i just up with the program, literally!

we also bought our neighbors little boy his gift, everything is wrapped so great here in Spain, they don't now, but i remember when they used to even wrap the stamps... although saying that the girls in one estanco did put them into little mini paper bags they had made earlier...

El Corte was empty considering the closeness to christmas, although the big present buying will be just before the Kings day, it was strangly quiet... as was Aldi, the new one coming up from Fuengirola on the Alhaurín road... you would have laughed... i grabbed a cart and then walked into through the 'out' door!!!! had to come out and come in the right door! really!

Waiting is painful.
Forgetting is painful.
But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering..
Paulo Coelho

TTFN
Marian

here is up close and personal with Tony's tree! still haven't got our selves a tree yet, not sure if we will bother now, i don't seem to have any incentive to go looking now, the old one and all the baubles gone...

this week we sadly attended a friends passing... not sure what to call it really, we went to the what we all thought was the crematorium here in alhaurín, never realising it isn't a crematorium at all... a cemetery and the church only... the nearest one may be at alorá for alhaurín.

anyway, we gathered... and said our goodbyes, to me she was one of our 'ladies that lunch', and was such a shock to all of us, totally unexpected and un real. there was no priest, no vicar no one to do a ceremony... a good friend stood and we said the lords prayer, then we were left with our thoughts and prayers for her onwards journey...

i must admit i was shocked and didn't know that this is actually quite normal for 'us lot', if you don't prepare someone for the service, have someone lined up so to speak, or are a different religion, if its very sudden you may not have anyone to officially wave you off... please click on this link and say this for carol... thank you...


ok... here on the left is a woodpecker as seen in my friends garden when i was in England... i don't think i have ever seen one before, apart from TV etc, it was stuck there on that bird feeder for so long i thought its beak was caught!






and here... home again, look at the snow on the sierra de las nieves...

last evening Franco and i went to la trocha after doing our food shopping in Lidl in Coín and Franco bought a new warm winter jacket, was great, got it home and there was the secure magnet thing... should have rung some bells when we left the store, that worked then didn't it!


its a huge fine, well deserved of 750€ for spitting in the street in Cartama, good job too, i think there is a fine everywhere for doing so, but not sure how much its implemented!

yesterday i went into Cudeca in town, they were having theyre christmas fayre in the shop, lots of people in the store, Santa was there, of course! hope they did well, they need lots more money coming in to keep the fountation running...

Be brave. Take risks. Nothing can substitute experience
Paulo Coelho

TTFN
Marian

back home en España...

yes home... seems longer than a month away, and not blogged for a while... so apologies and whats been happening! well to the left there is a snow globe... one of my favorite things! i love them, and here in Milton Keynes is the largest one i have ever seen... and we went in it! yes inside it... i made my poor mother go in it with me! and she loved it, as did i! once inside we threw the snow about and it got caught up in the air that was flowing from beneath we threw plastic snow at each other and got thoroughly covered in it! they took our photo and then we had some more play time and came out to collect our photos... will scan and publish another day... was the best ever fun, i recommend it, for bringing back the child in us all, we felt reinvigorated and exhilarated, so much so we went on the Merry go round later!

this mushroom is in Milton Keynes also... part of the Christmas display outside of John Lewis store... mom and i didn't see much of the so called recession either, here and in Watford, Hemel Hempstead and Aylesbury and St Albans, the places i visited a dozen times each! well nearly, people were arms full of shopping bags and for now, happy smiling faces....











this i took from inside Cinderellas carriage, didn't think mom could quite make it up onto a horse! although yes i would have!









on the Sunday the 23rd last day i blogged, this was the snowfall we awoke to! not much really i suppose, and out of the four weeks and 3 days i was in England, i only had to use my umbrella 3 times, not too much rain, i was lucky.







and finally i beautiful sun set one evening... this would have been about 4pm... this is always the strange thing for us in Spain, we might not have the long days of summer you have in the UK, but our winter days are longer...






ok Mom, her CAT scan went ok, not much fun the huge amount of a liquid she had to down in the hour before, it was dye for the scan, but all went well, she was supposed to wait 20 minutes afterwards to make sure she felt fine, but after 10 minutes mom wanted outta there, so despite my concerns we left!

her 2nd chemo is tomorrow, Tony is picking her up and then her best buddy, so she has company for the time there, the chemo itself is a quick half hour, its the time waiting after the blood test and the making up of the chemicals that make it a long day, and not one to be spent on her own...

my last week there Mom was buzzing, i think it was that snow globe! there was no stopping her, and likewise this week she has been doing stuff that she knows she might not feel up to later in the week, and today resting for tomorrow.

my flights are booked for her last chemo session, if all goes to plan that is, so those blood platelets better keep to their bargain!

It was so great walking into town yesterday morning, I walked on the other side of the street than i usually do, observing the other side of the road... and the people! i was on my way to a friend at work in the animal rescue store up near axa insurance, its a new shop, i was prevented from continuing up that side of the street though by a water main that was causing a storm! well it looked like one, the water was coming up out of the path like a fire hydrant in New York City! aiming up and over calle Gerald Brenan which was like a rain shower over the cars and the people who hadn't moved right over on the path on the other side of the road! i crossed road and got in the stream the water went right over and into my shoes... nice!

a couple of shops have closed, and some moved... rumors of bar rose opening again are good to hear... nothing against those bars nearby of course, just that right there in such a prominent position in the town it doesn't look good!

heck... most important... i came home to a new kitchen! it was a case of 'whose kitchen am i in'!!! its wonderful, i have all these cupboard things... lots of room now, and a sink that holds more than one plate, and a real draining board on it too! we didn't have one before, just two round side by side sinks! rubbish! its taking us a while to get used to it, going to pull out a drawer that's not there anymore... and the sink moved too! Pippa is ok, she doesn't mind where her bowls are, just as long as whats in them is there! oh and Pippa... she went just crazy to see me again, took so much longer for her to calm down than the normal after my long days down in Torremolinos! my baby just didn't know why i was away for so long, and i wondered if she thought i would be home when we went out Sunday morning! Sunday morning i awoke with a bad head ache, took some tablets and carried on though, too much to do, the shops were open! i had left my special neck pillow at Tony's, i was over weight!?! so had to get a new one from Ikea, and this time i got one for sleeping flat, which i need to do, to prevent pain, and the other pillow was for sleeping on your side! not sure what the difference is in the pillows though so don't ask! i got better as the pills kicked in and we went from there to Miramar in Fuengirola, and the Miramar Parque nearby too, got food and had a general good old walkabout! was shattered when we got home... so took more tablets... LOL!!!

ok... where is my Paulo Coelho book for my quotes... i need some more! think i better check out Amazon and add to my wish list!

A blessing rejected becomes a curse...
The Alchemist

TTFN
Marian

i took this the other night from tonys place, i think it was a full moon, very eerie looking with the sun still letting over from the right hand side...

mom... tired today, although on her third day of steriods, and her last, from this session of chemo, she had been full of energy, we have the CAT scan tomorrow afternoon... so hope she can keep going up to then, the scan should have been first, and these next few days are the ones the doctor said mom may not feel like leaving the house at all and just resting up... flu like symptoms.

last night, with barry being here too for the weekend at tonys, i went to collect mom and brought her back to st albans and the five of us went to 'little marakesh' restaurant in the high street, we sat in the little booth that feels like you are actually in morocco! the curtains and lights and stuff... anyway we all ate hartily and was a good evening, out side the temperature was falling to 0! and felt like it on the way to and from the restaurant... therefore was not a surprise to find a small layer of snow this morning on the roof tops and paths...

TTFN
Marian

these pics are also taken at milton keynes, the christmas
display in the big plaza infront of john lewis department
store.

tony thought this little fairy girl looked like me!?!





and this is the beautiful carousel thats here every year, its just like the one down in fuengirola, as i say, every year... i know ;-)









here is the little black bull on the ride... i was actually going to go on this, not the bull, but a horse, or in the carriage with mom, but then we forgot....







one of the ladies holding up the roof!!!









when i just came to post this i noticed on my first page of today the advert had changed to back ache problems! quick work guys!

hi there folks... seems un real posting photos of regents street in london where tony his girlfriend and i went a week last friday, i think... cant remember. but we did so here they are.


yesterday mom and i went to mount vernon for the pre chemo visit, a look around the chemotherapy suite, and mom had a blood test, so tomorrows chemo visit will be quicker than the rest... they dont actually make up the chemicals until after the blood test, incase the platelets are not right, and therefore too weak to take the chemo yet, this usually means another weeks wait and the 21 day cycle will carry on from that date instead.


i have now been to milton keynes twice on this visit, so far, keep it coming i say, but sunday was so busy, not been there when its been like that since i moved to spain, and they say there is a recession? all the people had many many bags and everyone was buy buy buy... christmas is in full swing for sure.

mom and i were in aylesbury earlier this week and i was at the till, i turned to mom and said why dont you go on up stairs to where she wanted to buy something, she said ok and off she went, i followed 2 or 3 mintues later, up one flight of stairs i went, to the display i expected to find her... walked all around up stairs in Boots (the chemist shop!) looked down the other flight of stairs, no mom, walked around again and down these stairs, looked around down stairs before back up and repeating the tour! finally i went back down to the till area again, worried mom and fallen or something, i had in mind i was going to ask to look on the store cameras! like they would have let me, but then there she was, just standing by the door! and she said oh marian, where have you been in was worried! she had forgotton to up stairs at all!!! heck...

then she bought a pretty little snow globe of a golden christmas tree, i made sure it worked... when she got home she phoned to tell me the winder was missing! i said how weird it was there? mom had put that one back and picked one up lower down on the shelf... and not checked!

and on filling up the car with petrol on our way home, i got back in the car and started the engine to find... i hadnt switched it off! not good... but at least i wasnted on my mobile and smoking too eh!!!

think mom wanted to go out again today, but i thought she should rest up a bit, or just pop down into berkhamsted with her friend she hasnt seen that much of since i have been here! and yesterday i bought some real strong (good stuff) pain killers for a head ache and all over ache i couldnt shake yesterday, took an hour or so work, but they are real good, feel bit heady again today, its just my neck.. stress eh...

more photos to post in a minute, but they will be above and you will have already seen them.

TTFN
Marian

well i didn't expect to be here in England at this time, i left Malaga airport on the plane that should have been bringing my mom to me in Spain!

things never turn out... no not strictly true, sometimes things do not turn out as we think they will, the plans of mice and men etc...

well results of mom MRI scan were not good, and when she was home Monday evening with tony, who had taken her, she called me, and an hour later i had brought my November 20th flight forward to Wednesday 5th, already they are using the phrase about remembering where you were etc when news of our 44th President came in, well i wont be forgetting for sure.

friends dropped me off at Malaga and once in the departure lounge another friend was there working and i was glad to see her there.

Thursday 6th we went to Mount Vernon, a very very good specialist hospital, for cancer, tony drove, was glad he was with us, and we got the full details of what the MRI scan showed, mom needs chemotherapy treatment, every three weeks for a course of six sessions, and will possible need more, she has a tumor that is where the previous cancer was, but was completely eradicated, so this has taken its place, the hemorrhage was to do with this and it aggravated another part, which in a way was good, or she would never have known of its presence.

the cancer has also spread to her lymph nodes. this is bad news.

mom is so positive, she has a very good mind set and is very determined to get through all the treatment and says she has so many more things to do in this life time and plans on doing them!

i am positive too, when i am with her, but when i am not - then my mind starts thinking stuff and its hard to think ahead at all.

i will be here to take her for a CAT scan she needs first and a visit to the chemo ward to learn what will be happening and all the procedures. and also for her first chemo session. then its back to tony...

please everyone send a prayer for my mom, Muriel...

Marian

Halloween and my last day!

bit late i know but had to show these wonderful photos my Uncle Richard in Long Island, NY sent me, absolutely fantastic eh! Done with real American feeling!

what fantastic pumpkin pie all these would make! heck!


and the old truck! looks like attack of the killer pumpkins....

Our Halloween was fairly quiet, due to the heavy rain! and i think most of the children who came round were the same 3 or 4, just trying to look different!

still we have plenty of sweets left over... probably full of MSG and i am still recovering from the drinks that i think made my face flare up again, someone suggested i try that Aquarius soda, well it did seem to help with thirst, but then on Monday i see it contains over 20% sodium, not good for me!

and yes Halloween also my last day on this contract down at the two Estanco's... good last day, not good with clients because of the torrential rain, but good with las chicas, lots of chat in the morning, a lovely meal in a nearby Italian restuarant, we drove, the other option would have been to swim! i had pizza and the five of us shared five wonderful deserts on one plate afterwards, a little rose wine and two(!!) cherry liquers... and at 4.30pm back to work, rain let up a little to allow the customers to come and get their supplies before heading of back to the UK! friday was the last day also for one of the girls and the shop has gone from 5 chicas to two next week for the month! we exchanged pressents and hugs and kisses and said our goodbye for nows... they gave me the worlds largest leaving card and written lovely things inside to me... so a day of very mixed emotions... but we have email address and phone numbers and i am sure we will keep in contact...

photos tomorrow of the lunch!

now this weeks notes... i went to Ikea three times!?! Tuesday to buy new neck pillows, Thursday for lunch with friend i used to work for in Cristinas, also to buy outer pillows for the above, and Friday... because one of the outer pillows was the wrong size! so this was an in and out, no stopping for meatballs on my way and get home quick...

the mornings when there was no rain i noticed lots of dew on the grass on the way through to de la Torre, reminded me of when i was little and i used to run around barefoot in the garden in the early morning dew, destroying the work of many spiders whose webs were strung from blade to blade and glistening like jewels... then sometimes my mate who lives over the small field between our houses would meet me half way and we would race around the field in the same manner making the horses bolt... and yes still in our nighties! well we were little, and stopped when we were at least 30! no just kidding!!!

i had thought when i had come to end of this contract job i would be able to claim a little benefit for a month or so till i got another job, but i think it seems you have to work or acrue 12 months to claim 4 months benefit, so will check to make sure, but dosent look hopeful.

well now awaiting news if mom can fly and is up to a road trip, she sees her speciallist tomorrow, monday and we will find out!

An enemy always represents a weakness.
This might be fear of physical pain,
but it could also be a premature sense of victory
or the desire to abandon the fight
because it is no longer worthwhile.
The Pilgrimage

TTFN
Marian

20/21

what a week... tony called me Thursday lunch time, letting me chat first for two seconds before saying "now don't panic..." well thats sure a trigger for panic for me, especially when tony calls from home in the middle of the week! mom had been taken into hospital, she pulled her emergency cord from her home and the services said to wait till the morning and call her doctors, which she did, and they said go to hospital! she is home now, had some tests and more this week coming to find out what was wrong, she says she feels ok now, and the symptoms have all cleared up, but i am worried her trip could be a bad idea, i don't know, two flights, a road trip of over 1'500 kilometers, she says one minute she wants to come, just not do much walking, well thats ok, i can cope with not too much walking, then the next minute she says about cancelling or using the trip without her! she is seeing her specialist on Monday 3rd, two days before her due date out here, so will see then anyway...

i suppose with worrying about mom i haven't had a good last few days either, but then i never really got over last week, after, or rather during Tonys call i got an immediate head ache, how come they don't go so quickly as they come, so i stayed at work where i could keep my mind busy, and Friday was my last day at Bajondillo Estanco, i just kept on taking the tablets as they say, worrying now if they will make me sick as the week before, during my lunch break a bad head i was trying to cope with went after i had eaten at burger king(!) although my face has now come out in a bit of a rash, maybe the BBQ sauce has MSG? don't know, but i felt better anyway for the rest of day, which made waking up yesterday, Saturday, with a terrible head ache took migraine tablet and went back to bed getting up late afternoon, feeling weak and horrible again, and this morning the same, headache through the night, every time i woke up it hurt more, and although i tried to get again this morning just ended up going back to bed... got up about two, i still had my head ache, from the pain in my neck this is, feel like some one has got hold of it and wrenched it off! anyway, i have pottered and moved about, sweeping floors, ironing (!) and washed my hair to try to get my neck working again... feeling very sorry for myself which is bad i know. i have to make it through this my last week the 21st, and the nearer i get the less sure i am of doing so.

at the beginning of this promo i made a little diagram sort of thing in my notebook which stays with me all day for notes and details for work etc, the diagram looks like a mountain and was my mountain of the weeks to get through, there are 6 steps, 4 lots of 4, the weeks and days therein, then 1 of 3 weeks and finally 1 of 2 weeks, crossing off the mornings and afternoons... no wonder it has seemed like a long time eh! and only week to go of being ignored and blanked by the few but always remembered visitors to our beautiful country, and still after 20 weeks its horrible and annoying!

we had one evening i think maybe Monday, cannot remember now where the cloud was so low over the mountain road from de la Torre to Alhaurín i really had trouble seeing more than 50 meters ahead of me, i have driven through cloud before but never this dense, it was like good old English fog!

and we have had lots of rain, again, i cant remember it raining so much in other September/Octobers? again, maybe because i wasn't out in it every day! the last couple of days of the week for fine, just sun and cloud, with beautiful colored sky's morning and evening. one of the nice days i ended up on the old bench from 2 years ago, ah ha, maybe thats why i got a bad neck, those benches are impossible to sit comfortable on, they they lean back to far and really hurt those already hurting!

and the paseo road right at the end where Torremolinos meets Malaga the beach has sort of reclaimed the road, it always gets bad there, but the road had turned into a river so they ended up moving the road around the new, or probably old river route!

once every other week or so i have found myself behind a police car following a big van thats come from the de la Torre prison, i sometime find myself wondering if it were the same police if they think, hey, why is she behind us again?!?

ok, I'm off now all typed out...

God always offers us a second chance in life.
By the River Piedra
I Sat Down and Wept
TTFN
Marian

its late on Sunday... first time i have even turned on my computer this weekend... un like me... the photos firstly... above and below very blurred i am sorry to say, and this windows vista does not seem to have the same facility as our old windows to help un blurr! but i think you can just make out the street that turned into a river on Tuesday morning past!


i had on a pair of wellington boots... yes really! but walking up this steep hill to our car the water came in over the top! and my friend didn't like the idea of me driving in this torrent and she said that it would stop in a half hour although i was adamant, that was until i started the car and the warning lights wouldn't go out and i didn't want to drive all the way to torremolinos with them flashing! so we stood on the doorstep watching this rain and the river road, had coffee and it stopped raining! oh the lights worked again ok when i tried again too!?


this is the view from where i park the car at work every other week, i have zoomed in of course... but that looks quite pretty doesn't it, looks like a small castle on top of the hill there....


and, above Friday, bit different from Tuesday eh! but thats what its like here, just cos it rains like crazy one day, or even morning, does not mean it wont be hot and dry later! and also Friday was probably the last day on the beach for me as this week coming i only have the one hour break and i think even less the week after, my last! cant believe, and after the week i have had this past, still not certain i will make it!

Wednesday woke up with bad neck and head, i wish my fibromyalgia could have picked a different worse joint to be, not my neck, hip or foot or elbow, why my neck, if my necks get bad i get a bad head ache.. so i took after my usual anti inflammatory a strong ish pain killer, but only one, an hour and half later, and outside work, i took another... i used to back in the UK take the full quote of paracetamol every day, of 2 every four hours, and that was for years to keep the pain level down, and the doctor said it was ok, checked out my bits and pieces every year to make sure i wasn't destroying anything inside! so taking another seems ok to me... anyway, i struggled through the morning and at break, after lunch took a migraine tablet... now i really am not sure what happened next or why, but the head ache went, in fact quite quickly, but then i felt very ill, and had an awful pain kind of high up in my stomach, almost under my ribs really, i went back into work at 4.30, and keeping details outta here for the weak stomachs among you... things did not turn out well and had to leave my post a couple of times, until i decided i had to try and get home, not a great prospect a 40 minute drive on a good day when your stomach is turning over and over, and it wasn't a good drive, i was ill again before i even got the engine started and it was just like my London courier driving days of migraine Thursdays and being ill while i drove! ok sorry folks... anyway i did get home in a bit of a sorry state and went to bed.

Thursday i couldn't go into work i was just sick all day, and the pain was/is excruciating, but hey, no headache!?! and although i went into work Friday i still have this awful pain when i take my tablets and eat, so i didn't eat much at all on Friday and am just eating little bits when i can.

yesterday, Saturday i had to make myself get in the car and go food shopping, i only got a bit, but really did not want to go out in case i was sick again, it was only the strange thought that this could be a trigger for some people to become agoraphobic, not me, but you could see how something like this could do it, fear of something happening outside, and then just not risking it again! and so, after shopping in Coín and unloading my purchases, i then took just a small walk into town and home, didn't even made bar rosa (still closed!).

today, washed the car and Pippa had a good walk around the trocha market, it was quite late when we got there and too many people for her, my poor baby was so nervous walking around, couldn't even see her tail. and we some lots friends... then home again.

and really today i havent done much at all, just watched tv and tried not to think about the pain in my stomach, or wherever it is! and thats it, have to wait now to have my dinner, Franco is eating his i have a tablet to take half hour before dinner and didnt time things right...

At every moment of our lives,
we have one foot in a fairy tale
and the other in the abyss.
Eleven Minutes

TTFN
Marian

Columbus Day

Christopher Columbus Day today.... although all the shops are open, at least down on the coast, the big malls, la cañada and miramar and ikea! and tomorrow everything is closed up tight, including the estanco i will be working in this week... ye ha! another day off for me! fantastic, sorry for my opposition friend who is at another estanco who is open, at least until 2pm i guess, and then hopefully she can go home, although two weeks ago she had to go to another shop for the afternoon!? and her company is Spanish who, as i believe are supposed to honour holy days, and otherwise double pay or a day off in lieu! or is it loo (in Cornwall? used to be a long way to go when i lived in England, to have a day trip there, from here would be down right silly!!!).

OK notes... am getting so tired now cant remember anything, could have fallen asleep driving home Friday evening, and it hadn't been an especially crazy day, just normal but so tired.

OK, something i missed last week to tell you that i was reminded about on Monday by a van i saw behind me, it was a people carrier type van and 'mom' had a small child on her lap, wrong side of her seat belt, all the way from de la torre to and through churriana!?! see a lot of it here, but i still don't understand the mentality of it, one wrong move and baby is through the windshield... and what it reminded me of was Friday evening going home i was at a set of lights on a big main road in torremolinos and a big pulled up beside me to scoot across the lights at the first opportunity, there was dad in front, mom behind and between her and his back was a small baby squished in... again, up here we see it alot, and here the traffic doesn't get to move as quick as down there on the big dual carriage ways, then... aghast... i saw a small hand holding on to the front of the bike... from the foot well between 'dads' legs... un believable, a small child down there also!?! crazy!

this week was pretty normal... usual people ignoring me, or looking straight through me, it has certainly made me think next time some poor promotions girl is trying to talk to me to at least hello and see what she is offering me, before my normal "no thank you" that i usually mutter! i don't ever blank them, manners don't cost anything. and a smile is free too! there were a lot of people with children this week, is it holidays in the UK again already? i am not supposed to approach people with children under 16, so i wait to be asked for info...

there was a man in shop who sounded just like my uncle chuck, and i asked him where he was from, he said Denver Colorado... i said oh! you sound just like my uncle but he was from New York City!? then he said, oh but i was born and brought up in the Bronx... so that made sense!

also a woman came in who was going to a convention in benalmadena on criminality! sounded great, the type of books i have been reading for the past 18 weeks have all been on the subject... strange how i have gone from the Stephen king type of book to the Patricia Cornwall etc stuff, i couldn't tell you who most of the books have even been written by which is bad i know, they are just all crime fiction! this lady told me to try Jeffery Deaver, so i am, cant wait to see what he is like!

it was windy on Friday down on the coast, and this is an understatement! we had rain and lots of it the day before, i was worried which way to get home, but it had stopped an hour before and the roads were almost dry by the time i left, then yesterday, Saturday i got blown down town, but coming home i almost got blown over! i was weighted down with far too many carrier bags to cope with, but i am glad i had them, as i crossed over by banco de andalucia at the top of the high street i nearly lost my footing, someone said we were having 70 mph gusts, i quite believe it! the town and surrounding mountains were covered in a heavy cloud or mist all day and the sun hardly got through, but i hung up two lots of hand washed clothes and a machine load, each was dried before the next got pegged up, and didn't even need ironing? even better! today is about the same...

this morning we had the singing in the street just before dawn, i actually thought it was usually later in the month... its so somber and beautiful... our small street full of people in the dark with only candles and singing so hauntingly....

we went for a walk down into town and back again, Pippa didn't know what hit her, she went out three times yesterday and then again today! the first walk yesterday it was still dark, to check the rental car, as ours had been broken into, again... messed up the bits of nothing in the glove box, and took an apple! they used a metal bar or wrench or something to jemmy it open and dented possibly the last of the undented section of our car! had have a car stolen in England, a long long time ago, but i have never had so much vandalism before, or heard so many stories from friends etc of so much robbery, thieving, mugging and car crime in my whole life, they say its the foreigners? who us? i am sorry i don't so... and when you report it, no report is taken, why because we are foreigners too! has this been what its like back in the UK for foreigners?

well 3 weeks to go, cant believe it, do you think i can make it now? may be in will be possible after all...

and as usual Paulo Coelho has come up with the answer with today's quote.. i just turn the page and copy here the next one, no picking out the ones i think relevant, it happens sometimes all by itself...

Love gives us the strength
to perform impossible tasks.
By the River Piedra
I sat down at wept

TTFN
Marian

October already, i just cant believe it... above is the month of September photo i took that went into our alhaurín calender, taken about about this time last year... we are having more rain than last year for sure over the last couple of weeks, this week was lots better i managed to get my siesta on the beach every day (!) this week unlike the one before! but today as i was about to walk into town i did an about turn for home as big drops of rain started falling, it didn't come to anything and the washing has dried... but some big storm clouds are looming over the horizon ominously...

yesterday we had a strange thing on the beach... millions, not exaggerating here, but really at least millions of small dragonflys, about 2 or 3 inches long all flying in from the direction of the sea? and not just ground level as you looked up they were well above ground too, and to add to that lots of small spiders? so the birds were having a field day, usually they just grab little bits from people eating on the beach but they had a feast of the two above as well! i was really worrying about getting them in my hair... either the dragonflys or the spiders, don't mind them in general but didn't want an infestation!

Monday... San Miguel, i went into town and chatted to friends over cafe con leche and mooched about the shops before going home and going a bit of much needed house work! but all day i felt like i was playing hooky, i kept expecting my supervisor to come along and put her hand on my shoulder... very weird feeling, Tuesday was ok, as i say weather good, but then i woke up Wednesday with a migraine?! real bad, and didn't get up until the Thursday morning when i went back to work, very shaky and disorientated... not sure if the car hadn't known the way that i would have even arrived down in torremolinos! felt bit better Friday, yesterday, but still a bit strange(er than normal)!

now i am also seeing lots of people who are on their 2nd or even 3rd trips over since this promo began in June... they're third holiday! what!

When you want something, the whole Universe
conspires to help you realize your desire.
The Alchemist

TTFN
Marian

first to these photos i took this week... i arrived down onto the paseo on bajondillo and came across this bizarre sight... the portacabin was being lifted onto the truck for removal, the shot above and the guy on the left using the winch to position it....


this photo taken through my bit dirty windscreen, but i didnt want you to miss what i was seeing...

and finally... yes this 'short' bed truck driving off with half the portacabin just hanging off the end! no longer attached to the winch, which i think would have at least helped stabalize it, the wiring and drainage just hanging there at the end.... unbelievable eh!

as to the rest of the week, my 16th done and dusted now... and this week has been raining off and on, it started an hour into my monday siesta after having paid 4€ to the guy running it, we all ran! spent the rest of my break in my car, and knew i couldnt be doing this again, so the rest of the week i only had an hour break, just like back in the UK, and it was much better, leaving work at 630 and getting home about 715ish, takes a bit longer at this time as the town here is still so busy.

tuesday morning was terrible for water, as it had rained all the night before and although it had let off in the morning, the whole of the paseo was flooded, there is no drainage here at all, the amount of money torremolinos is spending of taking away a third of the parking spaces would have been better spent on a system for taking away the excess water me thinks! the water was a foot deep in places and once your in it you just have to keep going, so we were all sending it over each others cars as we drove through it all! i was worried the car wouldnt start when i got back in it, but our good old jaloppy started just fine! and from wednesday morning i started using the new short cut i learnt last week now mornings and evenings!

think i have upset someone or something.... last sunday at la trocha market we were talking to people who had stopped to pet pippa and something fell, franco gave it to the bloke thinking it was theyres... turned out to be my bracelet! only a junk jewelry thing but i had had it for a long time! then later my necklace broke! tuesday morning i put the jewelry i normally wear everyday on a shelf, when i went back no more than five minutes later, an earing was gone? searched high and low... its gone! wednesday evening pippa was running around with francos glasses! so had to go to specsavers in fuengirola yesterday to get the lenses reframed... oh and today our car had been broken into... again, last night in the car park behind the town hall here in alhaurín el grande... just in case you want to know where to park to get your car to get robbed!

friday morning at work there was a strange boom noise and the windows of the shop seemed to move! it was like when they were doing some work out in the sea a few back and they used TNT and we all felt it at calahonda... there was a lot of speculation down in torremolinos about it being another bomb, after the few we have had so far over the summer down there, but then a man came in saying they had used a large amount of TNT up the mountian to blow through for the new tunnel they are building between de la torre and the coast, but it turns out now... to have been a sonic boom!?! so who knows!

after finding the car opened in the car park this morning we only went to get a couple of gas cans and came home disheartened... in the pooring rain!

tomorrow i have a day off!! yipee... its san miguel! no not the feast of drinking beer day, although i suppose it wouldnt be a bad idea right now! only, as those of you who know me better would know half a glass is enough for me! but seriously tomorrow is the fiesta of san miguel, or in english michaelmas day, all the details there on the left! but this to me means i can at last pay the car tax! we never received the original factura, bill, but did receive the letter telling us we hadnt paid it? and as the office near bar sardina is only open from 9am to 1.30pm we have been unable to pay it! although you cant actually pay it in the office, of course, you have to to there and they give you another(?) copy of the original bill and you take that to a bank of their choice! also have to pay the water bill and go into another bank! thank goodness i have a day off to relax eh!

When we put off the harvest, the fruit rots,
but when we put off our problems
they keep on growing.
The Fifth Mountian

TTFN
Marian

this week went so fast... 15 down six to go....

we had rain this week, one morning quite a bit and a guy in the store said why so much fuss about a drop of rain and the umbrella being borrowed.. you should be in England don't you remember what rain is? well apart from he only saw a drop here, he wouldn't like to be here when it really lets go and with no guttering and little street drainage, i think once the cars started floating about and he was getting wet from both ends he may reconsider... any way as usual i have gone off the conversation... the rain had since dried and umbrella being returned i asked him to look at the cars in the street and see how dirty they all were, he said yes he could see this, and i said that's what the umbrella is all about, the first few rain falls are filthy here so more to keep clean than the worry of getting a little damp!

then there was this really rude man he wouldn't talk to the girls and kept on talking to me and i had to relay the conversation... in English... to them... and then he came back the next day and we had to do it all over again!

Monday was an especially bad day, in the morning i dropped my mobile phone down the loo! oops! no alarm to wake me on the beach, no signal, no anything! and i also had forgotten my purse, so no money if i had needed some in an emergency like a phone call or something! the hamaka man on the beach said i could pay Tuesday, although he didn't want Mondays money when it came to it, and the kiosk man who i hadn't bought my tube of sweets from on Monday said i could still have had them and paid later... an angel in my midst...

also on Monday a couple i had seen in the other shop the week before and this one in the morning came back in, the man, led me down the end of the display asking me questions and i saw out of the corner of my eye the wife come in through the barriers with some thing in her arms, a rug or towel, not sure... then he left and she had gone... i write down the amount and types of 'our' cigarettes that are bought and noticed straight away five were gone and looked to the people in the lines to see who had them and to offer a gift, well none had them, i went out and the couple had rushed off down the street, well it looks like i had been used as a distraction and the shop was robbed... but too late with them gone... although i would remember them, they're baby girl had the most enormous big grown up gold earrings on..

i also nearly lost the car key in the sand another day, lifting my towel the key went flying and i could only just see it! that would have been great wouldn't it!

the day it rained i took my siesta with the manager of the store, she took me to her mom's place in Malaga for lunch, first course meat with potatoes, second fish with vegetables and for desert prickly pears, grapes and fresh figs... wonderful, we got to put our feet up in front of the tv for half hour afterwards before going back to work! her mom was lovely and invited me to visit anytime her daughter came for lunch... very sweet.

and that day also one of the other girls thought i might get home sooner if i took another road... so... she drove all the way to Churriana with me following, well a guy was in between us, but i could still see her even in the dark... and then she drove back to Torremolinos! its a good route, would have been better in july and august with all the people driving so slowly and randomly along the paseo, i came home that way last night too, it took 8 minutes from the shop near the paseo to the Churriana round about! not bad eh!

first thing this morning i went to check out the office where we have to pay the car tax, we didn't get a normal bill type thing to pay, don't know whose mail box that went to but not ours, although they found it ok with this one which is more money! the office opens at 9am and closes at 1.30pm Monday to Friday only, so not sure how we will pay this as neither of us are any where near Alhaurín at these times, the same for the car insurance that needs paying!?! help? i replaced my mobile phone with another in the vodafone shop using my points, so now i have a new phone which is all confusing for a while! and wanted to get some cash out from our bank but the machine was broken, again, this happens a lot and then we have to pay 2 or 3€ for a transaction in another bank, there are no other machines in the town that do not charge, one bank was over 4€, daylight robbery eh! and i am not sure how you would get any money back if you complained!

then Franco and i went to Ikea and then to the huge Carrefour in Malaga, massive isn't the word! also we spent far to much which is normal in a new shop with so many new things, there are lots of shops around the supermarket and places to eat, we paid 4€50c for two coffee's and a big piece of apple pie! not bad, some places would charge 4€ for the cake alone!... the site was a bit confusing getting to it, the normal road exit was shut so we just followed our noises and the same to get out again...

ok... all blogged out folks...

Courage. By beginning the journey with that word
and continuing with faith in God,
you will arrive wherever you need to arrive.
Manual of the Warrior of Light

TTFN
Marian

what a wonderful picture above, i have borrowed it from a site i receive emails from from time to time, have been trying to link to the whole page as i would like to share it with you all. will have to come back to it when i have given it some thought! its not a photo, so cant up load, its not a web page... its a document and its not letting me load it...

but for now this week... well today i got up early, just in case i were to get a head ache for laying in! by 9am i had cleared and washed the whole of the terrace, at last it looks good, washing washed and out on line, dry probably by now, better get the next batch out!

Franco came and went with a 'new' set of sofa's for the living room, bit big and not sure how to place to start, but i think i have it sorted now and only injury was a squashed wrist trying to lift an arm chair where it didn't really want to go!

I'm back and i bet you didn't even miss me huh! had to do a car change over thing and now we're both home, Franco liked the furniture positioning and Pippa has her own perch to look out of the window which she like to do at any time the window is open, or where she sits and whines if it isn't!

and now... where's my notes for the week? Monday i was ill again at work, by ill i just mean the pain gets too much and i feel almost unable to stand, and because the pain is so bad it hurts my head and stomach and everywhere, i left a bit earlier, but then i had come back in early so still did four hours, but then the traffic in town, here, is so bad that bit earlier that i was home much the same time! at least i shared the store with another promoter again, this time Gallaghers who do Benson and Hedges, Silk Cut etc, we were in the store the whole of August as she worked for the store to help them out. so Monday was interesting... watch this space!!!

the store is shutting half hour earlier now this week, although they didn't tell me this!?! so now my afternoon hours are from 4.30 to 8.30pm in the afternoons, and i get home about 9.20pm, bit earlier, but takes longer for the drive! and talking of 'the drive' sorry, but there was this guy so close to my bumper and had his lights up so i was blinded, had to turn my rear view mirror and move my door mirror, but impossible to get to the passenger one, so the glare was awful, he would not back off despite me tapping the breaks, using my window washer profusely! i was quite scared and when we got to Alhaurín and the round about there where we were going to have to stop i was worried in case he jumped out of his car, but maybe he was worried to as he tore off down a side street! he didn't know i was female and if i had been a bloke i would have jumped out and given him a piece of my mind...

we went down to maria's last Sunday to do a check on her place and we came the back way through from the La Cala road near the Noria golf club and comes out in Rivera, great short cut if you don't want to go down to the N340... anyway, we then came the back way into Calahonda from Rivera which comes out at the toll road roundabout and left down into Calahonda, do you really need to know all this? you know sometimes when i am talking to customers in the Estancos i realise i have been just talking and talking, and what have i been saying? then the same people come back to talk to me again!?! sorry... so i had a real shock when we were taking that road down towards to coast... all the land on the left which separated Rivera from Calahonda is stripped and ready for building work to happen! then before the new Super Sol etc is a new Church! that's all built and being used as far as i could see...

oh the rain! we had some early Tuesday morning, but not much then Wednesday early on lots of us were awoken by a fantastic thunder and lightening storm, lots and lots of rain! but it was all clear by the time i got to Torremolinos and i didn't need my para agua after all!

the anniversary of 9/11 has come and gone again, i have something i want to link to on this if i can later, but this time reminded me of where i was, on the island of Crete with Sarah, and seeing the horror unfolding on the Greek News program, of trying to get hold of mom, and then the following day being unable to get home due to the flying embargo, and then we we did, there was mom, she hadn't been to bed, or slept much her eyes little tiny slits, her home town devastated... my cousins helping clear the ground and everything... mom said in three years time on the tenth anniversary she wants her and i to go back again to ground zero, we went three years ago, but on the 3rd the new building and remembrance area should be finished.

i wanted to have some time and had set my alarm, luckily before i was back into work, first i got the time completely wrong thinking in west coast time, then i sorted myself out and thought right its six hours behind, which is correct but then... dopey here set if for one more hour ahead because we are so used to having to add on an hour for the tv! i woke up at 3pm though, in my dream a door bell rang!

and finally once again... yesterday did another silly thing, apart from getting my words all mixed up and being extra forgetfull, usually these things come before a migraine... but i had sent a mate a text message and forgot to lock my mobile and sent the same message ten more times, none to her, eight to ACE fm, they must have been pleased with me! and two to someone in england! so that was nearly all my credit gone! all i could think though was thank goodness the text was ok.... if you know what i mean... ;-)

sunday 14th
when i was driving to work friday morning an ambulance came past me, and at a new round about just before churriana the ambulance was parked up by a big blue police van and another three police cars joined them, the car which was on the road coming down from the campo had a blanket over the windscreen, which at the time i thought bad news, and today, there is a wreath there now on the fence...

When there is no turning back,
then we should concern oursolves only
with the best way of going forward.
The Alchemist

TTFN
Marian



ps.. chrissy... when you coming over?

photo above was taken Thursday evening, this shot is courtesy of the new site InMálagatoday.com which includes Coín, Alhora and Alhaurín de la Torre web sites, as well as our own Alhaurín el Grande, of course! the link is also to the right there in the links section...

i myself was coming up from Torremolinos and as i drove up the Churriana road could see this huge cloud coming from the other side of the mountain to the left... after making my way around the town and then heading out towards de la Torre it was much more obvious of the cause, the awful blood red of the sky and a thread of cloud moving slowly over the sliver of moon, in the dark the glow was horrendous... and i had it in my sights all the way to Alhaurín....

and the man driving in front of me must have seen it too, impossible to miss it, and yet he still through out a lite cigarette from his car window... un believable but i guess if your number is a local one and the digits are 6613 you will know who you are... and know you could have been responsible for starting another fire on this side of the Sierra de Mijas!



thought also i missed out something last time i wrote, my mind was otherwise occupied of course, but the car we had borrowed and took back on the Sunday morning was borrowed on the Monday or Tuesday, cant remember which now, but that first night Franco parked it up behind the town hall here where we all park our cars... in the morning two windows had been smashed and the interior trashed... thank goodness we had taken out the kiddies seats or they would have been gone... so we had to get news windows, and then have them tinted and then get the car back as we didn't want to risk it happening again, which i am sure it would have!

the windows we had to wait a couple of days for, no auto glass comes out to you here in the hour to change your window on the spot... and the tinters... we took it to the place at La Trocha, down in the car park there, Franco took it Saturday morning at nine and they said to bring it back at 5pm, which we did, they said ok great now come back at 9pm to collect it! but it still was'nt ready till nearly ten pm... been great if your were stuck there! hardly anything to keep you occupied for an hour never mind all day!


the photo in the middle i took during the week of a big big boat out there in the Med carrying cargo... and the one above i took from the car one morning in c/playamar of a block of apartments....

now the week gone, number 13, 8 to go.... what else has happened? apart from the Thursday fire there must have been another big one on Wednesday due to the amount of helicopters and planes picking up water during the afternoon, and again on the Thursday morning, or maybe that was the sierra de Mijas started already i don't know.

a couple came in two morning running to buy some cigs, and twice the machine wouldn't except their credit card, till they came in Thursday and it turned out that they're card had been cloned down in Torremolinos during the week, two big restaurant bills had gone on it and the bank had stopped it, how on earth did they know it wasn't them?

also we had Tourists Day during the week, which means free Paella down on the beach for all, i remember it two years ago... i did think about having some, but then with the possibility of it having a stock cube in i declined...

and apart from the man amongst many who i see throwing out those lite cigarettes a guy parked his car opposite the Estanco and went to a bar for an hour, leaving his dog in the car, poor little thing in this heat...

... and the lady who parked so close to a car her daughter banged it hard when she got out and when the mom went to rear door on that side opened it hard also, so hard she actually had to start the car and move it to release it from the one she had hit!!!

12 year old down our street is now driving his own scooter, despite it being illegal to drive one here now till you are 16...

people in the Estanco... as usual thank goodness again for those that are nice, talking and chatting and asking questions, not just about the tobacco but España in general... because as me and the other promotors say it makes up for those that either totally blank us or look and turn their backs to us... then there are those who ask for discount when they buy two cartons(?) and those who buy 32 and ask for nothing....

one lovely couple who talked for ages are from Hayling Island, Hampshire, this is their hotel... and i am sure they would make everyone very welcome, i will be putting the link in my links section too, let me know if you go there please...

ok now lots to do around the house, been to town this morning, saw and chatted with lots of friends and got caught up on stuff like Bar Rosa being closed... two different rumors so withholding till i know the facts... but the cross roundabout is not the same with our favorite bar closed and empty....

before i go though... i must say on Monday, i went to work and got on with normal things and the girls in that shop and my supervisor were so good, listening to me talking about my step mom, and just letting me get stuff out of my system...

The great blessing of life is the existence
of tomorrows - and having dreams to realize.
from an Interview

TTFN
Marian

Mijas pueblo

this morning after doing dropping off the car we had been borrowing we came up to Mijas....



i wanted to go to the little Ermita Virgin de la Peña to light a candle for my step mom, Carol, who died yesterday after a long battle with cancer, i had hoped against hope of seeing her next year for sure, of being in LA for my birthday and as usual, we can never ever depend on anything being as we wish when we wish it... and now.... i just feel i didn't call enough, write enough, or try harder to go and see her... i sent a letter, which came back due to an address error at the start of this promotion, couldn't see one and just tore it up planning on calling her, i sent a post card about a month ago, but not sure if it arrived, i have been taken up with this job and its hours, and the weekends with trying to get up enough resources to just keep going for me that i let slip my calls and thought when this job is over, everything will get back to normal, doesn't work like that does it. and i suppose we think lazy thoughts that people will always be there no matter what.

my brother called just after midnight this morning, i knew it was a 'bad' call, just knew, and once again those 6000 miles are too great.

in the 12 weeks of this job two girls in the two shops have lost family, my supervisor her uncle, my son his friend and a friend here in alhuarín her brother, (she was traveling to uk to see him and he died that morning), now carol... 6 too many in such a short time.

The Good Fight is the one that we fight
in the name of our dreams.
The Pilgrimage

TTFN
Marian