Friday, April 27, 2018

Hey friends, sorry, again! I've been here on placement for two weeks nearly, it's a good one, me being positive, talking lots, and good conversations... I actually don't want to leave!

We've been in the midst of April weather, the real deal, showers and sunshine... Like our lives... The stunning magnolia above...

And it's fallen few below....

Walking onto a nearby bridge this week to capture a phone signal!! Really please, 21st century and still black spots?!?

And this beauty was there in the grass verge! Gorgeous isn't it! I saw its leaves and thought tulip, but this flower head is extraordinary, once back in the house I checked it's name 'Sun lover' tulip, it's beautiful.

Not much else to say really; I ordered something on Amazon and inadvertently hit the 'Amazon Prime please' instead of the 'no thank you' with these apparently massive clumsy fingers of mine! I don't bother zooming out enough so I guess my finger was like a giant in the land of ants placing the order!

But, I've taken advantage of the free books offer thingy and chose a book I really shouldn't have 'Things we never said.' Don't get me wrong it's a wonderful book, I'm just not in the right place to read it, and maybe never would be. Maybe there never is a good time for some things...

So yes I'm reading it, crying with it...

It's been a difficult few weeks, I'm either feeling okay, or down in the depths of complete and utter sorrow.

I can't for confidentiality reasons say very much about work situations, but I have to say I was somewhere talking to a psychologist who had given a talk on one subject about our mental health after something! (Sorry!) But although it was not about grief it felt like it, and his answers gave me answers, or maybe more a way of thinking or realising that carrying the grief changes, maybe doesn't so much lesson, it's about learning to carry it differently.

But then we are all different, all see life differently, thankfully, and what works for one won't necessarily work for another.

Still, I'm glad I got to hear the talk.

I'm off from here on Sunday and headed across country and then north!

Thursday, April 12, 2018

Sorry, I am here, not been very talkative.

Had the worse anniversary of my life, sorry mom... But Franco was with me for yours...

The day passed here at work strangely, very unreal, in fact don't call out the men in white coats, but when I'm this close to where we lived I feel Franco is actually there, and even just half hour ago I wondered if I ran off in the car to Britain Ferry if he might be there.. you know, in some bizarre other dimension.

I don't even like going in British supermarkets... Even ones he didn't go in, because they just remind me too much.

I leave here Sunday and onto the next one.
Two weeks then nearly a week in the uk, chilling! Before heading back to spain, Pippa is in her hokdida home anyway because of the May celebrations, and mammoth rocket explosions.

And well that's it folks!