Wednesday, July 20, 2011


Another birthday come and gone, and look I came through the other end... I know the problem now, after all this time, I always have huge expectations for my birthdays, and Christmas too I suppose... There has been occasion where I had promised myself something I wanted to do on my birthday, then outside influences have prevented my plans, one of which a couple of years back I had planned ten year before!

So I make my expectations very high, then... bam, reality cannot complete and I am left feeling down hearted I suppose... I, maybe, delved a little bit too deep into this thought over the weekend, and wondered where these high expectations come from, and I wonder if its from when I was little and I always hoped to hear from my Dad, a card, a visit [highly unlikely, considering we moved to a different country], when he died I was ten, but maybe I have been left with that feeling of hope on these two days... Who knows, maybe I am just doing what everyone does, and am analysing far too much over nothing much!

We went down to town on my birthday, started the day with a plate of churros and una taza de chocolate, very nice, sitting in the sun and eating these lovely things...

Then it was back home and just relaxed really the rest of the day...

Ok hospital appointment last evening for results of Doppler scan... I have a heart defect, I have to go back and make an appointment to see a cardiologist and I think that is for meds, to take, forever!!!! He told me to go back on the blood pressure meds, and to take for the pain of the effect of the cysts twice a day a mix of two different pain killers, both strong, and one of which usually gives me a headache! So fun eh!

I tried to find out more about these spinal cysts, he[the doctor], says I have some, a few, they need to be operated on to remove, and I have to see someone about that, I am to expect letters through the post about both things, I think!

That's me for today, tired and hot, well actually, strangely cool and clammy for some reason! Maybe I better open the persianas and let some sun as it starts to set....

TTFN
Marian

2 comments:

Gypsy said...

I am sorry to hear your physical news, Marian. I don't know how you stay so upbeat --or at any rate, that is how it seems. A prayer for you tonight...

co

Marian said...

Thank you... You know I don't know either, I try not to be alone in my head too much... its scary in there!

I sometimes feel I am 'putting on a show' but then when I am alone, which is quite a lot, I just try not to think too much...

xx